20 September 2010

if Pluto is not a planet, how can these people be stars?

My television addiction, Dancing with the Stars, premieres tonight (I think), but I’m just going to come out and say it: I’m not watching this season until Bristol Palin, and her accompanying familiar of a mother, are both gone, gone, gone. It’s not that I have anything personal against America’s Luckiest Unwed Teenage Mother – I’m benevolent enough to hope her children grow up in a country that soundly rejects Bristol’s smug, ignorant gorgon of a mother and her ilk – but I’m starting to wonder about the casting on that show. They’ve had the loathsome Tucker Carlson; they had the criminal thug Tom Delay, who should have been two-stepping in federal prison, and now this. I find it difficult to believe that the far-reaching tentacles of ABC/ESPN/Disney can’t find enough vaguely remembered Disney channel stars, middle-aged boy band singers, Olympic athletes on an off-year, reality stars (make that “reality” “stars”), or former cast members of Melrose 90210 to fill out the roster. What’s with all the right-wing scum?

I realize the definition of “star” is pretty loose here: I’m perfectly prepared to find The Situation unexpectedly charming, and that vacuous girl from The Hills (that doesn't narrow it down, does it?) surprisingly inoffensive; if they want Americana, that’s fine, they can always bring back Buzz Aldrin, if only to continue their challenging game of working “American hero” and “walked on the moon” into every single reference to him – besides, he has the distinction of being the only contestant who’s had an opera written about him; I’ll even put up with the passive-aggressive narcissist Kate Gosselin, who does wooden pieces denouncing the paparazzi who invade her privacy, and who can currently be seen posing in a bikini on the cover of People of her own free will; I’m willing to accept that young woman who got dumped on The Bachelor – I forget her name, but they kept talking about how she was “humiliated on national television” – sweetie, you were humiliated on national television the day you first appeared on The Bachelor to begin with – but I draw the line at Palin and her pack of parasites. Why can't I watch my little TV dancing show without a constant reminder of how rotten in so many ways this country is? Someone tell me when they’ve crawled back under their rocks. Until then, I’ll guess I'll watch Derek, their best choreographer, on YouTube.

8 comments:

John Marcher said...

I saw that she was on the show as I was looking at a headline on USA Today and I thought "how the hell did this happen?"

Doesn't she have a child to raise?

I've never seen the show, but I think your boycott is perfectly reasonable. When will the Palins simply go away?

Patrick J. Vaz said...

I suspect they won't until there isn't another dime to be squeezed out of the public, and as PT Barnum reminded us, there's a sucker born every minute. . .

Ms. Baker said...

Well, I'm afraid your boycott needs to last another week, but probably not much longer than that, unless I've underestimated her fan base.
Last night, after a few attempts by the hosts to get little Bristol to answer some simple questions, one of the hosts said, "She'll get over her shyness soon," and I thought, "she might just be really dumb and that isn't so easily gotten over."

Patrick J. Vaz said...

Maybe she was too worried about her child to speak coherently -- you know, the child she's left . . . somewhere? cha-cha-cha!

so who got kicked off?

momo said...

One of the producers is probably a big Republican doner. I can't watch it anymore either for the same reasons.

Patrick J. Vaz said...

It wouldn't surprise me at all if that was the case about the producers -- what does surprise/irritate/anger me is that such a producer wouldn't think that there's anything about the politics or attitudes of these people that might alienate a lot of the audience -- or would think that any such "controversy" would generate "buzz" for the show, as if no one is going to take their loathsome political views seriously enough to turn the show off. It's a dance show, not a Sunday morning political talk show (not that those aren't also freak shows).

Laurel Kornfeld said...

Pluto IS still a planet. Only four percent of the IAU voted on the controversial demotion, and most are not planetary scientists. Their decision was immediately opposed in a formal petition by hundreds of professional astronomers led by New Horizons Principal Investigator Dr. Alan Stern.

As for these people, none of them are stars unless they are capable of producing their own light through hydrogen fusion.

Patrick J. Vaz said...

Thank you for both clarifications!